It has been cold.
Cold and dry.
I wear a wool coat.
My car has cloth seats.
Yep, I'm going somewhere with this.
While having static filled hair flying everywhere and inevitably ending up in my eyes or mouth is pretty horrible, that is one nuisance I can deal with. The little static shocks that one gets when getting out of the car, or opening a door are another story entirely.
I have an irrational fear of static shock. This is time of year when I look like an obsessive compulsive spastic. I have a formula for degaussing myself that involves getting out of the car carefully, avoiding contact with all metal parts. I shut the door by pushing the window glass. Once I am safe I quickly tap the hood of the car with the flat pads of my fingers. This distributes the shock evenly and quickly closes the circuit that I am creating.
Even after this ritual though I tend to find myself doing a strange dance when faced with metal door handles. I reach out, hesitate, pull back, reach out again, close my eyes so that I "don't see it coming" and again do the weird tap/degauss maneuver before opening the door. People probably think I'm strange.*
It's not just outdoors. I purposefully do not have a spring mattress because I have been shocked while changing sheets. I just bought a new cotton blanket because the "fleece" one I had been using sparkles like a vampire when I pull it out of the dryer. I never enjoyed the rub-a-balloon-on-your-head-and-make-it-stick-to-the-wall game and I certainly did NOT enjoy the rub-your-feet-on-the-carpet-and-poke-your-older-sister-with-static-hands game.
The only other thing in the world that makes me this nervous is the glaucoma test at the optometrist that blows a small puff of air into the eye. Luckily I only have to deal with that once a year.
How about you guys? Please tell me I'm not the only person in the world scared of static...
*they are probably right.